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Tuesday, 18 May 2010

#414

Sometimes i wonder why my parents cannot understand me..
I wanna change job but they don't allow..
They never listen to my explanation..
Only he can have his reasoning and i cant..
Seriously damn frusted talking to them..
They never listens to other people..
At least my mom just say get another job first..
My dad keeps saying it's good working here..
It's near and the job is easy..
Wtf..
So you want me to work here for the rest of my life
with low pay just because it's near?
When i said i wanna find a part time job,
mom said go ahead since i do nothing at home during night time..
What did dad say?
He asked me to don't "fatt chin hon"..
Better go take a part time course or something..
As if i don't already know that..
I want to do that too..
But where do i get the money from if i don't work for it first?
If i quit my job without discussing with them,
they will emo me..
If i try to discuss with them, there is no point..
Why?
Coz they will have all their reasons and i cant have mine..

Sometimes i really feel lazy to talk to him..
I can't have opinions..
If my opinion differ from his,
i can't stand for it..
Even when i quarrel with my siblings it's always my fault..
No matter what it is..
Even if i do the same thing as my sibling
on different time i will get the scolding when i do it and they won't..
Is it because i'm a middle child?
You always say those who bite their nail have
phsychological problem..
Yea i bite my nail..
Yea i phsychological problem..
Do YOU know why?
Do YOU know what causes it?
Do YOU know what is my problem?

Have you ever thought of running away?
I have..
If it wasn't for my mom i think i would've left..
And of course it i run away i can't go home for Sabbath..
But i really really wanna move out..
Feel like i'm going crazy staying in this house..
Everything i do is never right for him..
Maybe it's because i'm different..
I don't have long hair..
I'm not a boy..
I'm not good at boot licking..
I say what i wanna say..
Do what i wanna do..
Even when i'm helping out with housework its not enough..
Buy stuff for you guys you have to comment..
Buy food for you guys to eat still have to nag..
When i talk you say i talk too much..
When i don't talk you say i am mental..
Seriously dono what to do..

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